For My Future Husband

Dear Future Husband,

I don't know who you are. Maybe I know you already or maybe we have not met yet. Sometimes waiting can seem like forever. I hope that you are being patient and waiting for me as well. Proverbs 3:5-6 says, "Trust in the Lord with all your heart and do not lean on your own understanding. In all your ways, acknowledge Him, and He will make your paths straight." Sometimes it is hard to trust in a God that I can't see. But, I know this verse is true.

You should know. Sometimes I have a hard time getting up in the morning. But, tea can make it all better (English breakfast tea is my favorite). I love to read and write. However, math is sometimes my enemy. There will be days where I will want to go out with our friends or walk around town. There will be other days where I will need a break from people and will want to stay home. Sometimes it is a struggle - this personality between extrovert and introvert. However, I love helping people. I'm going to nursing school because I want to show God's love to others, even in the darkest of times.

Love. It is more than a feeling. It is the act of every day selflessly giving to others. In a marriage, this selfless love will be tested all the time. We are sinful human beings. We need God to help us in this endeavor. As my future husband, I hope that you will (in God's strength) lead me and our family in this selfless love. You don't have to perfect. I won't be perfect. But, we will become one in this selfless process. It requires both of us to submit to God daily so that we can be selfless to each other.

Children. I pray that you will help me raise our children in the ways of the Lord. I want our kids to know that they are unconditionally loved - by us and their Creator. Psalm 139:14 says, "I praise you because I am fearfully and wonderfully made; your works are wonderful, I know that full well." They are precious. They are gifts. There will be days when our patience is fried. There will be days when we will want to raise our voices and say vicious things, even if we don't really mean them. Please keep me accountable and I will do the same to you. I don't want yelling in our house. It does no good. Words have so much power. Angry/demeaning words can leave so many scars. Proverbs 15:1 says, "A gentle answer turns away wrath, but a harsh word stirs up anger." However, uplifting/caring words can bring hope and change. I have had a dream since I was young to adopt. I would love to adopt children who are in great need, like from foster care. I would also like to have biological children. If we were to do these two things, we will have to be very careful with our words. Of course, I know that God's plan is perfect. And, that brings me to my next point...

Pray. Prayer is more powerful than we will ever know. It is our chance to talk to the God of the universe. How amazing is that? Romans 12:12 says, "Rejoice in hope, be patient in tribulation, be constant in prayer." Please pray with me and for me as I do the same. In every circumstance, we should pray first: during/after our wedding, through new jobs, rough days, children, at night, in the morning, on the phone, through deaths, for others, at church, and so much more. I want to see a revival in myself and the people around me and I believe that starts with prayer. Our marriage will struggle if we don't put God first. Let's pray before that happens.

Gentleness. I believe that there are times for strength and righteous anger. However, often the strength of a Godly man is shown through gentleness. The truth is, we are different for a reason. As a woman, I need a husband who will protect me physically, emotionally, mentally, and sexually. That doesn't mean I am weak. There is a difference. However, God knows this need for gentleness. He displays it in the way He comforts widows and welcomes children.

Convictions. We will each have our convictions. We may agree on some and not on others. However, it is important to not ask each other to compromise our convictions, within reason. For example, I am striving to live a pure life, in Christ. I will not compromise that. And, I pray that this is a conviction that we will both have as followers of Christ. Another example of a conviction that I have is drinking. I will not drink underage. It is a personal conviction and believe that God is calling me to it. Sometimes each other's convictions will seem silly. However, I believe it is important to help each other stand in them through Jesus.

Identity. Our identities should never be found in each other. Our identities should be in the Lord at all times. It has been a struggle for me to place my identity in God instead of others. However, the more I lean on God and trust Him with my identity and heart, the more I find peace in His arms. I pray that you will remind me when I forget that my identity is found in Christ, as is yours.

Taken from http://www.happywivesclub.com/successful-marriage-2/

Above all, Christ must be first. You will not be able to love me unless you love God with all of your heart. I know that we hear that all the time in church. However, it is so true. Right now, I am not ready to get married. I know that because there are days when Christ is not first in my priorities, decisions, dreams, and thoughts. We will never be perfect. However, it is a process of putting God first - a daily surrender. If we are not both daily surrendering to Christ, we will not be unified in marriage. It is just that simple.

Wherever you are, I'm praying for you. It doesn't matter where you've been. It doesn't matter what you've done.  It doesn't matter if I meet you next week or 10 years from now. God will bring us together. For now, I will continue to wait and be patient.

Love, Jenna

What I Learned at VBS from a 4th Grader

"If you think about it, the world is like a big painting that God made."

"We are all unique...like different colored grains of sand."

"I need God. Sometimes I don't realize that I need Him...but then I remember."

"I think that Jesus would want me to give everyone a second chance."

"People learn about God in different ways. For me, I learn about Him through art projects."

"Let me think of a hypothetical situation where I could be like Jesus to my friends and family."

God works in mysterious ways. He often teaches me what I need to learn in the most surprising times. Last week, I helped out with my 5th Vacation Bible School (VBS). For the last 4 years, I have moved up with a particular class. I started with them when they were in 1st grade and this year they were in 4th grade. There is a specific girl in the class that I have had every year.

This year, she didn't participate in rec. So, I brought in crafts. We did art projects all week. It was one of my favorite parts of each day. And, over the course of the week, I got to see a piece of her heart. The quotes are hers. We often don't give children enough credit. There is a reason why God commanded us to have childlike faith. Children can see the world through God's eyes often easier than adults. They trust. They love. They see people as unique. They don't care about race. They see people as God's creation. How often do we ask God to show us the world through His eyes? I almost missed it. I almost handed her a piece of chalk to play by herself while I was with the other kids playing the particular rec game. But God lead me to put down the checklists, the plans, and to just sit and talk with a girl who was ready to be open. He lead me to bring in crafts and watch His handiwork in this girl's life.

We often miss a lot by not trusting God with childlike faith. This time, I trusted. I need to do that more. I need to be open to the unexpected. I need to be transparent. I need to be ready to serve with all my heart at God's leading. 

When we do particular evangelistic outreaches, we often think, "I wonder how many people will get saved?" Although this is very important, sometimes evangelism is relationship orientated. I really noticed that this last week. I have watched my class grow so much over the last 4 years. When they were in first grade, I prayed for this specific girl. I still have the journal entry from the first year asking God for her salvation. But, God's timing is always perfect, even when it is hard to see. She never accepted Christ at VBS. She asked Jesus to be the Lord of her life at some other time, probably with her parents. That is amazing. She is a true daughter of the King regardless of where she accepted Christ. However, I got to plant some seeds in her life. Last week, I was blessed with the ability to see some of the results. Sometimes we don't get to see what happens. Sometimes we just have to trust God and plant the seeds, knowing that He has everything under control.

Pic from http://centerpointcf.com/ministries/missions/

We are called to share the good new of Christ. Will we follow the command with childlike faith? Or will we stubbornly demand God for answers? Will we trust that God will help us to plant the seeds and let Him do the changing? Or will we miss what He is calling us to do? I am going to try to listen more to God's leading. I am going to focus on loving people instead of 'saving them.'

Taken from http://www.lovethispic.com/image/29256/you-cannot-save-people

What are you going to do?